About Balrogs and Daughters

Posted on December 16, 2014 Updated on December 16, 2014

In-laws. There’s a word.

In this instance I am referring to my daughter’s spouses. As loving and dutiful parents we pray for the wonderful people our children will someday marry, God willing. We ask Jesus to “grow em up real good like”. The thing is…there is no guarantee. There is trust that the Lord has heard our prayers, not a small thing, and the understanding that He has our kids best interests at heart. Again, not a small thing. Still we as the parents are not in control of these events. A lesson better learned sooner.

Being the dad I was used to my wife having that mama-bear-thing going on when some misinformed person actually had the audacity to take on one our kids. Big mistake. Huge! What I never expected was what I felt when my daughters were more than just serious about a guy. The hidden papa-bear-thing awakened unexpectedly from the deep. Picture the balrog in the mines of Moria from The Fellowship of the Ring and you begin to get a glimpse.

Before I go any further, however, please allow me set the record straight. Both of my daughter’s husbands are amazing men. I love them both dearly and for two main reasons: 1. They are exceptional men of honor, and 2. They love and treat our girls well.

None-the-less…it still took some time for the taming of the balrog.

Ever see the movie Father of the Bride?  I have because I have four daughters. I felt just like George Banks did.

“Dad! I met a man and we fell in love and we’re getting married.”

Says who? thinks the balrog. Never mind my daughter Annie was an adult successfully living on her own for a few years. (Don’t confuse the issue with the facts.) Oh, and Abbey, she had been dating her fella for years. No surprise there. Still, there was the balrog with his protective low growl simmering just below the surface; watching and waiting patiently.

Oh I was all smiles and lighthearted for sure, but I was eyeing these men like a hawk. I was ready to bring down the fire whip if needed.

As it turned out there was no need. Darn it. That could have been really fun. Instead, I found myself liking both these gents immensely. Totally different in personalities, totally different in temperaments, totally different in interests and hobbies at certain levels, yet both perfectly suited for our girls. They were the direct answer to our prayers in an overwhelmingly big way.

Annie married Tristan, and Abbey married Tom. Tristan took the family by storm, while Tom took the slow and steady approach to winning us over. Both have succeeded unconditionally. We couldn’t have better sons-in-law if we growed ’em ourselves.

Now there are four men in the family and the odds are shifting to a more even playing field. It’s no longer just Aaron and myself holding down the male side of the family fort. We are four strong with opportunity to be six someday.

I do feel for the men who want to marry Amber and Amy in the future. I think there may be four low growling balrogs circling below just waiting for an opportunity to rise from the depths. I wonder if these yet-to-be-known fellas have ever heard about balrogs and daughters?

It’s a good thing they are in our prayers.